What is our condition as a faith community? As Wilton Meeting looks back at 1989, we can see strengths and weaknesses. These were brought out in the comments people made in response to the New York Yearly Meeting suggested questions.
Meeting for Worship remains at a high level for most of us, although we have missed the presence of three members who moved away. On the other hand, four new members have been welcomed this year, and their presence, along with several new faithful attenders, enriches us. Messages reflect the gathered quality of worship, just as the depth of the silence reflects it. Instead of preparing a message we need to think about preparing ourselves for Meeting for Worship so that we are open for messages to come through us.
Listening during Meeting for Worship is not an automatic thing for our meeting. To the question "How do you know when you're really listening," respondents answered: "I forget everything else; I don't hear myself; I don't have to struggle to avoid fitting what I hear into my preconceptions about it; and I am truly accepting." We try to open our hearts, not only our ears.
Most people (not only Quakers!) have experienced some sort of divisiveness and struggled to gain healing. "Accepting good and bad as part of me" helped one person. Another one opined "I try to remove the discussion to a higher level of abstraction or spirituality. But does this lead to resolution, or merely avoidance?" As a Meeting we have tried both during our Business Meetings; a call for a moment of silence sometimes brings a new solution.
In general, ours is a very unified meeting with little overt divisiveness. However, we do feel that the issues about family life raised in the revision of Faith and Practice are capable of raising strong feelings that may, at least on the surface, seem to conflict. In this respect we ask ourselves how much should Friends look to the Society for direction in their personal lifestyles as distinguished from spiritual guidance. An area that is potentially difficult, if not divisive, is our desire to support so many more causes that we seem to be able to afford. We have not entirely come to grips with this disparity in our budgeting (both personal and Meeting). Another practical issue that is inherently but, perhaps, justifiably divisive is our practice of restricting membership on certain committees to members. Should New York Yearly Meeting rethink this policy?
Our outreach to the wider community has decreased somewhat, now that the Sanctuary family that we sheltered for two and a half years has moved. We had a Day of Sanctuary to fast and reflect in March, sponsored a talk by the Guatemala rights leader, Amicar Mendre, in November and remain active in the national Alliance of Sanctuary Communities. We continue to offer care for community children at the Helen Gander Friends Nursery School and participate in the Wilton Clergy Association. We shared potluck evenings with members of the Community Baptist Church twice this year. This winter's series of Friday evening videotape showings and discussion on "Mythology" with Joseph Campbell and Bill Moyers was advertised in local papers. Our contacts with other meetings are fewer than desirable, but we did hold a Purchase Quarterly Meeting here in May, and individual members have participated in a panel discussion at another Quarterly Meeting in August, become involved in planning the Quaker Studies Program for this year, attended Powell House programs, and become committed to Friends in Unity with Nature. Within the meeting itself, we have held a number of gatherings throughout the year to enhance closeness. From October to June we held monthly discussions groups before Meeting for Worship on a number of subjects. For the youth of our meeting, First Day School offers classes for three age groups; the youngest group has seen a marvelous growth in number this year, and the older groups cooked feasts for us four times this year. In January we held a well-attended "mini-retreat" for a day and an optional night at the Meeting House, with the theme of conflict resolution in family situations. In March, John Calvi led a workshop on healing. In June, a large group gathered after Meeting for Worship to learn more about the drug and addiction problem in our area, followed by another meeting in November. And in December, for the first time in recent memory, we formally welcomed a new baby, Brianna Higgins, into our Meeting with a "Meeting for Worship in Celebration for a New Life."
Some things to consider which might enhance our meeting are: improved attendance, music, being aware of and ministering to each others needs and adult education. In regard to the latter, the Quaker Studies Program has attracted considerable interest, participation by six members and attenders, and aroused the curiosity of many. One member has been working with others in Purchase Quarterly Meeting to broaden the concept, and as a result the Quarter will have a new committee to initiate and oversee religious enrichment activities for all.
In general terms our Monthly Meeting at Wilton remains at once devoted and diverse. However, too small a core of members and attenders attend regularly, staff committees, and tend to the concerns of the Meeting. In all, the meetings is growing, though very slowly, adding two or three new members a year but often losing some, who move away. We look forward to the new year.